This story could belong to a man or a woman. Negative messages affect everyone. As you read, think about the messages you received growing up and how they shaped your view of God.

I grew up in a home that looked good on the outside. Every Sunday we dressed up and went to church. But behind closed doors, things were different. I experienced abuse—sexual, emotional, and sometimes physical.

I learned it wasn’t safe to disagree. I learned I was a bother to adults. I learned I wasn’t smart enough, tall enough, or pretty enough. I was too loud, too active. Nothing I did was ever quite good enough. But I never stopped trying to be accepted.

My family moved often, so I attended many schools. To fit in, I became outwardly confident but inwardly insecure. My deepest fear was: “If anyone ever really knew me…” I had casual friends but no real friends.

The messages I received at home became my image of God. I saw Him as someone I could never please, someone stern and unpredictable. Yet I never stopped trying to earn His love.